Worries Part II… “Why?”
Here’s another nagging question Leuk throws at us:
“Why me?”
Asking why will drive you nuts if you let it. Of course we all wonder what the medical cause is, but that’s different. “Why me?” implies a cause beyond science; why did God allow this?
Though there can be a medical reason, I don’t believe there is a metaphysical reason, except, possibly, the seeking of an opportunity.
Perhaps we are asking the wrong question. Instead of “why me?”, maybe we should be asking “what is my purpose now that I have leukemia?”
I gotta tell you, facing a life-threatening disease has a way of making you focus: the importance of family and friends, the sudden urge to help others, and the desire to leave a legacy for your children and grandchildren.
Sure, if I could wave a magic wand and suddenly be healthy again I’d jump at the chance. But maybe, just maybe, I can find a hidden blessing in all this.
Suddenly life isn’t about what you’ll get around to tomorrow. It’s about what you can do Today.
There’s one thing positive I can say about my new house guest, Leuk. He’s doing a pretty good job of kicking my old friend, Procrastination, out the door.
Pain is not always with me–just intermittently with little flares.
I need procrastination kicked out of the door! It seems to linger especially when I am in pain, but that isn’t always either.
What has helped me to consider is:
Instead of asking “why?”, ask “Who is with me?”
I’m so sorry for the pain you deal with. I think of you often my Texas cousin; so far away, yet so close.